The Homestar Witch Project

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Strong Sad's crappy taste in horror films inspires Strong Bad to make his own crappy found footage movie.

See The Homestar Witch Project Costumes for more information on what everyone was wearing. (UPDATE, THAT PAGE WILL NOT BE FINISHED. here's all the costumes) COSTUMES:

  • Homestar as Kermit the Frog
  • Strong Bad as Rey Mysterio (the WWE wrestler)
  • The Cheat as a Puffle (from Club Penguin)
  • Pom Pom as Gabe Newell (CEO of Valve Software)
  • Coach Z as Eminem
  • Bubs as Dr. John
  • Strong Mad as Knuckles the Echnida (Sonic Boom version)
  • Strong Sad as Dr. Moreau
  • Marzipan as David Van Dressen (from Beavis and Butthead)
  • The KOT as Dr. Loomis (from the Halloween films)
  • The Poopsmith as Tim (from Monty Python and the Holy Grail)
  • Homsar as Feaky Fred from Courage the Cowardslu Dog)
  • Senor Cardgage as Serj Tarkinian (of the band System of a Down)
  • Stinkoman as Junko Enoshima (from Danganronpa)
  • 1-Up as Lupin III
  • Humidibot as Mr. Poopybutthole (from Rick and Morty)
  • Honstlar as Chad Warden


(Strong Bad in costume is lying facedown on the couch in his basement. The couch is surrounded by loads of Halloween bags that all have black-and-orange taffy spilling out. SB's hand itself is in a bag of Chippty Chomps. He as always mumbles:)

SB: Ohh..Yoshi's Nintendo...never happened agai-

(some soort of demonic noise is heard along with a loud crash.)

SB: mode sev-(wakes up) the huh? Is Strong Mad trying to make his own candy bars again? By crushing a whole candy factory to bits like last time? Well, nothing else scary is going on, let's see what's up...

(he leaves and peeks his head in again quickly, looking at his candy bags)

SB: ...why was every parent in this town only giving out crappy dyed taffy?

(leaves for real. He goes up to Strong Sad's room, watching it from the outside as the laughter continues.)

SB: (to himself) Strong Sad? What's he happy about? I know it's Halloween but Bubs stopped offering those special ecto-cooler black burnt cookie-dough and actual toxic waste milkshakes. (close up on him) That alone makes ME resort to an eating coma to crack a smile, let alone HIM.

(SB enters SS' room. It has been decorated with tiny paper ghost and bats on the cealing and there is a poster for The Misfits over The Cure. SS is watching something on his phone and, smiling the whole way, laughs historically.)

SB: What's the big idea, sugarloaf?

SS: (barely able to muster up the words) so..euphoric

SB: At what? I thought they closed that haunted house because of your "inappropriate behavior"

SS: look! (presents phone to SB)

(Cut to SS' phone screen. We see the movie, filmed in live-action. It is very obviously just one man walking through his house, with ketchup on the walls and chicken bones on the floor, holding his camera.

SB: (voiceover) The crap is this? "Doug the Dino 2: Live Free or Dino Hard"?

SS: (voiceover) give it a moment...

(the man approaches his door. An airhorn can be obviously seen attached to the man's door. He opens it, revealing it is merely his fireplace. The door slowly creeks to the right and finally taps the airhorn lightly, making a pathetic wheeze sound. The man drops the camera and screams in an unconvincing manner:)

Man: The flame monster...has taken his next life

(back to the characters themselves. SS is enthgusaded by SB has barely blinked.)

SB: So either this bozo prematurely had a heart attack...or he has an unusual fear of fire. And in either case I'd wonder what kinda hoarding habits led him to put an airhoprn like that...WHAT WAS THAT?

SS: Only the next big thing! Horror movies made entirely on your phone!

SB: please. I could do this on the john. The unstoppable injection we call "the internet" has taken another life and the victim is horror. (close up) You can't just be worried there'll be a loud noise in your house! Horror should be fake people suffering real problems! Things that can and will happen. In fact...(dramatic music begins)...I know a little someone whose happened and that fraction-limbeled flake will teach Strong Sad A LESSOOOOOOON! (as he screams this background turns to black and lightning strikes. Every-time the background is not black during the flash The background is blue and Homestar's (costumeless) silhouette is in the background. Homestar's silhouette eventually zooms in and the titles begin. After titles the scene shifts to the perspective of a camera's filming. Strong Bad is showing holding it, having apparently just and backs up into place. The Cheat and SM in their costumes, as well as a low-quality looking vacuum are near him.).

SB: Day 1 in search of the Homestar Witch. (SB close up) Anything could go wrong. We could actually find him. Our camera can run out of battery. We could run (faces left) OUT OF GOOD SNACKS!

(pan left Strong Mad is shown to have packed nothing but prunes.)


SB: Well we won't get anything done here-

SM: (offscreen) I BEG TO DIFFER!

(crunch noise is heard and SM is seen to have eaten the whole box along with part of The Cheat's fur, both on his costume and body.)

SB: (quickly) let's go.

(They pass by a group of characters: Stinkoman, 1-Up, Senor Cardgage, Preserdy, Rafferdy and Humidibot under a sign "UNLOVED CHARACTER COSTUME MISINDIFICATION"

1-Up: What a kawaii Babydoll from Sucker Punch costume, Stinkoman. And did you take some inspiration from watashi, old man? (to Senor Cardgage)

SC: I'm sorry Tomoko, my body modifications have been ignorant of yourself.


Easter Eggs

Click Senor Cardgage in his scene to reveal a bonus scene with Honstlar's secret costume: Chad Warden.

Honstlar: That little controller? Baby that looks like a futuristic candy bar. I ain't tryin' to play my games with no FUTURISTIC...CANDY BAR.